Actions you're not proud of
It is hard to respect myself when I do something I am ashamed of.
It’s hard to accept myself when I see myself doing things that are against my values.
Can I stop doing things I won’t respect myself for?
Saying that sometimes there is no choice is a bad decision.
Shifting responsibility doesn’t inspire trust,
and it doesn’t help you trust yourself more.
It’s a matter of choice - do I do something I won’t be proud of myself for,
or do I find a way not to?
To clearly see this contradiction, this conflict is to take a step toward resolving it.
Doing something I definitely won’t be proud of to avoid conflict - is that an effective solution?
The conflict is already there, internal.
Interpersonal conflict always contains an element of internal conflict.
Otherwise, it wouldn’t be bothersome, and thus wouldn’t be interpersonal conflict.
It is the internal tension that expresses itself into external conflict.
If there is tension inside, even suppressed tension, it is already a conflict. One cannot avoid what is already happening.
But conflict can be resolved if we come to an understanding - what is bothering me and what do I want for myself?
Seeing the choices and making a decision is an effective way to come to terms with myself.
The better I understand how I choose to act, the more likely I am to make an informed choice.
The better I understand what I want - the more obvious the decision will be. It’s not hard to make a decision, it’s hard to look inside yourself and realize “what I want”.
It’s a simple concept:
- Don’t do things - that I would be ashamed of myself for, that I wouldn’t be able to respect myself for.
- Doing things - that would be an embarrassment to be done.
It requires understanding - what do I deem not worthy, what is contrary to my own values, for which I will not be able to respect myself later?
It requires effort. You don’t have to be perfect to accept yourself.
The beauty of this concept is that I can center myself.
It doesn’t matter who thinks what is not worthy of respect.
What matters is what I consider worthy of respect and living according to my own values.
Figuring out what I consider important is the hardest part.
But it’s a map that you can make once and not be lost anymore.
🧲 Subscribe to new posts: Twitter or Atom or Telegram channel