A list of what you can and can't do with me
Constraints are not only harmful.
But there are also helpful ones.
These are the constraints that we create for ourselves.
They are necessary to get what we want effectively.
The danger of labels
If you label someone, you don’t see the person behind the label.
This also applies to generalizations: “You’re always late”, “you can’t do anything right”.
The interaction then is not with the person but with the image.
The person has their own feelings and needs, the label has none.
Self Empathy
We often judge ourselves more harshly than we judge our friends or loved ones.
We react more harshly to our own misdeeds and show less understanding of ourselves.
Disturbing Situations
What to do about disturbing situations?
Something happened 3 days ago but it is still vaguely bothersome.
Or someone’s action makes me irritated whenever I remember it.
Or I get vague fear and confusion when I remember something minor.
Important Agreements
Sometimes people agree on something, they agree on something,
but then it turns out that everyone understood the agreement in their own way.
A glass of water in the desert
Sometimes what happens to me gives me strength.
Sometimes what happens adds to my nervousness, feeling tired and apathetic.
Or is it not something that happens to me, but something that I myself affect?
Opportunities for contact
People communicate all the time, but they don’t always become friends.
Even if people live together and are in a relationship, this does not guarantee closeness and mutual understanding.
What determines whether a relationship will become more intimate over time or not?
Is it possible to foresee this or even influence it?
Fear of knowing the truth
Fear of knowing the truth gets in the way of talking about what’s important,
from learning what you need to know.
It gets in the way of making important decisions.
Actions you're not proud of
It is hard to respect myself when I do something I am ashamed of.
It’s hard to accept myself when I see myself doing things that are against my values.
Can I stop doing things I won’t respect myself for?